Sid Roth

LISA: I’ll forgive him when he brings forth some fruit worthy of repentance. Then I’ll forgive him when I have some kind of hope that this is not going to be another weekend like all the other weekends then I’ll forgive him. And the Holy Spirit said to me he cannot change unless you forgive him. And then he began to talk to me about when I come to Him and I ask for forgiveness. And I said God forgive me. I gossiped again. He doesn’t say to me You know what? You’re just going to do it again next week. Just come back when you’re really sorry, Lisa. He always says to me I believe you want to change and I forgive you. And God told me he said when your husband comes home from this weekend away rather than bringing up you did this, this, this and this but I forgive you. He said you can only say John, I believe you want to change and I forgive you. And from that time forward it was never a problem again. But it had created a fear in me and then John felt like a failure and the guilt and the shame and the condemnation he was feeling just escalated it. And you know there are some women and I mean I’m never saying a women that gets hit isn’t a victim, but I didn’t cower in a corner. I hit him back. So we were just ridiculous.

SID: You grabbed a lamp. (LAUGHING)

LISA: I grabbed a lamp and went after him. Absolutely. I did not, I did not take it laying down.

JOHN: (LAUGHING) Oh, man

SID: John, John, how did that John, how did that affect you when Lisa came with a Jesus type of attitude when you came back?

JOHN: You know I was, I was so humbled by it and so in awe of it that it made me want to change. And I mean I was like oh my gosh, she’s just, she’s, she’s not berating me. That’s the thing. We would berate each other. So I would just hone in on what she was doing wrong. She would hone in on what I would be doing wrong. And it was so freeing to me and it gave me a motivation even more so which I had already gotten when I went away and prayed that weekend, but a motivation to say gosh, I got to be her prince. I got to be her champion and you know I mean deep down in every single person you wouldn’t have married that person probably 99.9% of the time if the man didn’t want to be the champion for his wife. That’s the desire of every guy. And when Lisa started treating me with such tenderness and forgiveness, I was like it made me want to be her champion even more. Does that make sense?

SID: And, and so if that’s what the man is looking for, Lisa, what is the woman looking for?

LISA: Well I think every woman wants to know that she’s irreplaceable. Everything in our culture says to this woman  you’re never going to be good enough. You’re never going to be thin enough. You’re never going to be tall enough. You’re never going to be young enough. You’re never going to be beautiful enough. There’s always going to be a competitor out there that can displace you at any given moment. And I think that’s why so many women feel so insecure in their marriage. And so one of the best things that John did for me was he built me up. It was like, okay so when we were first, you know first dating all I had was a suntan and a six-pack. Not a beer. But I actually used to be buff and muscular. So John would say things like I bet she’s going to be an amazing mother. I bet she’s going to be great with money. I bet she’ll be a great cook. And I was an idiot! I didn’t know how to do any of those things.

SID: [LAUGHS]