Sid Roth

RICHARD: [PRAYING] Let’s pray: Holy Spirit, we thank You for Your presence here, Lord. We don’t invite you, we just welcome You. We thank You that you’ve been here tonight, and Lord we welcome you to minister into our hearts to transform us into your image. Confess our absolute dependence upon You, Lord. We need you more than anyone and any words. In Jesus name, Amen.

RICHARD: Anybody here struggle with sin in your life? Yeah, we got a few people. Anybody here sin a lot? At some point maybe you wondered maybe I’ve gone too far. Anybody been there? Am I the only One? We’ve got a few other, we’ve got a lot of sinners here. 

AUDIENCE: [LAUGHS]      

RICHARD: But you know Jesus was a friend of sinners and he was pretty comfortable there. The thing that encourages me, Luke 7:47. This is what Jesus said. The woman that had washed his feet with her hair-

RICHARD: [READS LUKE 7:47]

RICHARD: Anybody ever get to that place where you wondered, ‘Can God really love me?’ You feel it, you know the truth, you learn it in Sunday School, but you ask the question, ‘Can God really love me?’ What about this one. I know God forgives sin, but maybe I’ve gone just a little too far. Maybe I’ve sinned one too many times. Anybody ever felt that? What about I know God forgives, but I don’t deserve it therefore I won’t accept His forgiveness.  There was a woman that was about to have her hands amputated, she came to us.  We knew that the root of that was intense self-hatred. And I asked her, ‘Is there anything you’ve never been able to forgive yourself for?’ She asked if her daughter could be removed. As her daughter left, she began to talk about something that happened when she was 15 years old, that she had never been able to forgive herself for. 51 years old, 36 years later, that self-hatred had begun to take its toll on her body. Severe type of arthritis that begins to attack your appendages. She’d taught Sunday School, she’d been the pastor’s secretary. She knew the truth. She knew the word of God. But she also believed she didn’t deserve it. Aren’t you glad that we don’t have to wait ’til we deserve it? Anybody ever get to this place? I accept His forgiveness but I won’t forgive myself. This woman struggled to forgive herself. She finally accepted God’s forgiveness. I said, ‘Are you ready to forgive yourself?’ and she goes, ‘No way, I can never do that. I vowed I would never forgive myself.’ I said, ‘If the highest court in the land declares you not guilty, can a lower court hold you accountable for your crimes?’ And she said, ‘No.’ I said, ‘Are you putting yourself and your justice above the court of heaven?’ She goes, ‘Well that doesn’t sound really good, does it?’ I said, ‘I don’t think so.’

AUDIENCE:  [LAUGHS]

RICHARD: I said, ‘Would you forgive yourself?’ 36 years! I can never forgive myself, and that night she forgave herself. That week she went in to see the doctors, they pulled the bandages off her and her hands were restored, everything but the finger nails, they had already fallen off. And I told this story for a number of years and then I was at a home school meeting and I walked in and this grandmother was sitting there watching her granddaughter get some achievement and she was sitting there tapping her fingers and I got to see the rest of the story. I love it when God allows you to see the rest of the story. ‘Cause when He restores He restores completely. Amen?

AUDIENCE: Amen!

RICHARD: Amen!

RICHARD: Anyone ever say, ‘I hate myself, I hate myself for what I’ve done, I hate the way I look, I hate whatever it is.’ And here we have eight times Leviticus 19:18: Love your neighbor as yourself. Leviticus 19:34: Love Him as yourself. Matthew 19:19: Honor your father and mother and you will love your neighbor as yourself. Matthew 22:39: the first commandment is to love the lord your God and the second is like it, you shall love your neighbor as yourself. Mark 12 31: the second is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. Luke 10:27: And he answered you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself. Romans 13:9: The commandments: You shall not commit adultery, you shall not murder, you shall not steal, you shall not bear false witness, you shall not covet-and if there is any other commandment are all summed up in this saying, namely: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. Galatians 5:14: for all the law is fulfilled in one word: You shall love your neighbor as yourself, and James 2:8: If ye fulfill the royal law according to the scripture, You shall love thy neighbor as thyself. It almost sounds like heresy to talk about loving yourself. We grow up learning to almost hate our self…I’m just a sinner saved by grace. To talk about loving yourself sounds wrong, according to how we grew up. But the whole law is fulfilled in loving your neighbor as you love yourself. If you don’t love yourself it’s going to be hard to love your neighbor.

AUDIENCE: Yes. C’mon now!

RICHARD: Where is the breakdown? Do we start by going, I love myself, I love myself, I love myself, I love myself-

AUDIENCE: [LAUGHS] 

SID: Now, Jenny went from no self worth so bankrupt, she went and tried everything. Nothing helped. Nothing filled her, that gap, but she says when she understood the next two things we’ll be talking about. That not only for her, but for you also. You’re not going to be a roller coaster, up one day, down the next. Up, down, up down. No, no. Jenny, tell me your identity now.

JENNY: I am a daughter of the Most High King. My identity is that I am a true worshiper. I walk in victory every single day. I walk in signs, miracles and wonders because the spirit of God lives within me. So, that is who I am. I am a daughter of the king and daughters don’t have to beg for things. We just get everything that our father has for us. Sons don’t have to beg for things. They just get everything that the father has for them. So, that’s my identity and it can be yours too.

SID: The second question I have, you were up and down, mostly down but now you live in a continuous breakthrough. How can others get to that same breakthrough?

JENNY: The secret is the secret place. To have lasting breakthrough you have to have a secret place where you go and you meet with the Lord every day and you commune with him. That is how you can have the transformation of your mind. You’re reading the word, you’re singing the word, you’re worshiping. You have your one on one time and you get filled up with his presence. You will have lasting breakthrough because you won’t look through your eyes anymore. You’ll see with his eyes and everything shifts, everything changes.

SID: I want to release you now to the music set and I would love to have you worship God. If you’ll go to that set right now, but I’m reminded when she was absolutely desperate, she yelled out to God, God help me. I believe there are many watching me that you don’t know God. You might have known about him as a kid. You might have known about him through Judaism or through Islam or through Christianity, but you never had experiential knowledge with him. I would like to pray a supernatural prayer right now and when I pray this prayer, if you’ll say it out loud and believe it to the best of your ability, God will do for you what he did for jenny and what he did for this Jewish man. Repeat after me out loud.

SID: Dear God.

Audience: Dear God.

SID: I’m a sinner.

Audience: I’m a sinner.

SID: Against you and you alone have I sinned.

Audience: Against you and you alone have I sinned.

SID: And I’m so sorry.

Audience: And I’m so sorry.

SID: I believe the blood of Jesus.

Audience: I believe the blood of Jesus.

SID: Washes away all of my sins.

Audience: Washes away all of my sins.

SID: And I’m clean.

Audience: And I’m clean.

SID: I boldly proclaim.

Audience: I boldly proclaim.

SID: That Jesus lives inside of me.

Audience: That Jesus lives inside of me.

SID: And he is my Lord.

Audience: And he is my Lord.

SID: And I seal this.

Audience: And I seal this.

SID: In his name.

Audience: In his name.

SID: Jesus.

Audience: Jesus.

SID: Thank you.

Audience: Thank you.

SID: Amen.

Audience: Amen.

SID: We’ll have jenny play a little bit and minister to you but for more with jenny after this show ends, I want you to go to sidroth.org and now here’s Jenny.

JENNY: Psalms 27. (singing)

JENNY: Jesus, we thank you for what you’ve done and what you’re going to do for every person. Every person that believes. Father you will move on their behalf and you’re working it all out for their good and we thank you and we love you. Jesus’ mighty name.

JENNY: (singing)

Jenny Weaver grew up struggling with many deep issues. Such as cutting, witch craft, rebellions, self hatred, rejection, sexual brokenness, drug addiction, violence and even homelessness. But Jesus stepped in and set her free from every single stronghold and bondage. Now Jenny wants to show you how simple it is to walk in the freedom that your heart longs for.

JENNY: I want people to understand that we’re stepping into a whole new worship movement and he will encounter people like never before. There’s a greater glory coming and we can be a part of that.

SID: I tell you, we’re on the edge of our seats. Tell me about this letter you get from America two months after you wrote a letter and didn’t even expect a reply.

NATASHA: Well, in fact, it was a few months after I got my first package since that time. This Baptist mission located in Sacramento, California, they’ve been so faithful. They would send a monthly package with another issue of magazine, some brochures, and 10 copies of the same issue of the newspaper.

SID: Did you keep putting them under the doors?

NATASHA: Yes, I kept putting-

SID: She’s an evangelist and doesn’t even know it!

NATASHA: I didn’t even know it. What happened one day, I receive this letter and the return address said it’s Sacramento, California, but the name of the person who mailed it was an American name. As I remember, it was Patrick Panic. I never knew this person. I opened the letter, start reading it. This man writes to me that he is a Christian and he decided to visit this Russian church that is not far from his home. When he came to this Russian church and as he stood at the book stand, he meets this Russian man named Nikolai, who was an editor of the magazine to whom I wrote a letter. He said as they start talking, Nikolai pulls out of the pocket of his jacket my letter.

NATASHA: He tells this American believer, “She is an atheist. She’s 29 years old. She doesn’t believe that God exists. Please pray for her.” He handed him my letter. I mean, when I read this, that touched my heart so much. An American Christian and this editor didn’t throw away my letter. He carried it. He treasured it. It means my life matters. It means there is an American who is not indifferent to me. Then the last two sentences, they were, as we say in Russia, the last drop in my overfilled cup.

NATASHA: It said, “I want you to know I am praying for you” and “God loves you.” That was it. Now I know that we put these sentences at the end of every letter without even thinking, but these two sentences changed my life.

SID: What did you feel?

NATASHA: I felt like, I mean, there was someone who I considered an enemy, he’s praying for me. He cares about me. He wants the best for me. Then he says that God loves me. Now, by that time, every night because I read all the literature and at the end of every issue of the magazine and the newspaper, there was a Lord’s prayer. At a certain point, I start thinking, “What if He exists? Just in case, I’m going to start praying before I go to bed, just reading this Lord’s prayer. Just in case, you know?”

SID: Insurance.

NATASHA: When I read God loves me, it penetrated my heart. I was so excited and just ran to the phone to call my friend, Alla.

SID: The one that says you’re going to hell.

NATASHA: Yes, she gave up on me. Anyway, I called her and I said, “Alla, you need to understand. I got a letter from an American. Can you imagine? An American! He says that God loves me and he’s praying for me. I need to show you this letter. I need to translate to you this letter.” She was not really very excited. She gave up on me for sure and she said, “Well, you know, I don’t really have time. Tomorrow is a Sunday, I’m going to church. I don’t have time for you.” I said, “Well, can I go to church with you just to show this letter?” Kind of I’m inviting myself.

SID: I hope you’re getting this. This woman’s so assured she was going to hell, she didn’t want to even invite her to church.

NATASHA: She finally agreed and so we met together the next day. I translated the whole letter while we were riding a bus. We came to the church. It was an old Pentecostal church. They survived persecution, etc., and so we were sitting in the balcony and during the service, my eyes suddenly were opened and I suddenly realized that God is a reality. He is real. He exists. You know, I was crying and I was whispering to God. I said, “God, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you existed. If I had known you existed, I would follow you. I’m so sorry. I just didn’t know about you, anything. Could you forgive me for that?”

NATASHA: Then there was an altar call. You know, I knelt, such was the tradition, you kneel, and all I could say, everything was so spontaneous, but it was God. I was just crying and repeating the same phrase, “Jesus, I didn’t know you existed. I’m so sorry.” Then the minister of the church helped me and led me into the prayer of repentance and accepting Jesus and when I stood up, I never thought that I lived with such a burden. When I stood up, the burden, it seemed like the burden of the sins of the whole world was lifted from me. I was filled with peace and joy and lightness. I was transformed and I was absolutely a new person.

NATASHA: The next thought was, you know, I need to run home and tell my parents. They will be excited to hear about that God exists and Jesus is real.

SID: As a new believer, she was hired as a translator and heard a revelation that was different than any of these new Christians had ever heard before, and she found out that she could operate in miracles the same way that people on TV did. She never knew it. She thought people had to have special anointings from God, but she got the most amazing revelation that few Christians in America have. We’ll be right back.